


sweet as honey

by Meowteorite



Category: Eldarya (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Jealous, Jealousy, Love, Romance, Sex, Smut, Spoilers, episode20, episode21, helpmypuresoul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:28:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27742273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meowteorite/pseuds/Meowteorite
Summary: As Ezarel had finally confessed to the Guardienne, her desires changed dramatically, leaving her confused.! Spoiler warnings at the beginning of each chapter. !
Relationships: Ezarel/Gardienne | Guardian | Erika, Gardienne | Guardian | Erika/Leiftan
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !! spoilers for episode 20 !!

A beam of light was shining into my face, filling my head with an uncomfortable warmth. This warmth was comparable to the one I felt as the spear entered and left my body within seconds, making a huge amount of blood run down my spine. I thought that I surely had to be dead, but as I tried to open my eyes and saw the brown ceiling of my room at the Fenghuang Temple, I knew that I was alive. I looked around the room, hoping to see Huang Hua or Eweleïn, wanting to see Ezarel, but nobody was there. Not that I actually thought Ezarel would've bothered to care about me, after all he had only stated not too long ago that I should forget him.

I was eager to find someone to talk to. Had I slept through our battle? How much damage did it inflict upon the temple, and had I not been the only one that had been hurt? I wanted answers to all of my questions as soon as possible, so I hastily sat up in bed which had been a mistake, as I found out soon enough. I inhaled sharply as I felt pain in my back, but it didn’t stop me and so I stood up. I walked out of the room and noticed the damaged walls of the Temple while crossing the hallway. As I was in front of Huang Hua’s room, I knocked and stepped in.

Her face lit up upon seeing me and soon enough I had a pair of arms around me, which only hurt a little. Behind her was Eweleïn, who looked just as happy to see me. “What happened? How much time has passed since the battle?”, I asked as soon as Huang Hua let me go. The atmosphere changed dramatically again as they both opened their mouths, not knowing what information to give me first. Eweleïn spoke up: „You were asleep for three days. When you fell to the ground with that spear in your back, we all thought you’d be …” She stopped for a second. “But Leiftan went totally crazy. He ran up to you and Naytili, it was as if time stopped for a moment, and he broke her neck. The battle was over, our attackers withdrew and then our priority was to save you.” I couldn’t believe what I heard. Leiftan had always been such a gentle being, I would never have guessed that he could break somebody’s neck so easily. Huang Hua looked straight into my eyes. “We tried to find someone with a suitable blood type for you.” And so, they told me that my quick healing was thanks to having Leiftan’s blood running through my veins. But also, that I had not been the only one hurt in battle.

I stumbled outside not knowing what to think. All of this information had been too much for my already lightheaded mind, so I walked back to my room. My head was spinning in circles and I felt alone. So many emotions all at once and I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. Had Ezarel been hurt? And why did Leiftan get this angry? I came to the conclusion that I at least had to ask the latter about his well-being, as the other one surely didn’t want to talk to me anyways.

Leiftan was leaning against one of the walls in one of the hallways, his eyes closed and his hands in his pockets. His skin was paler than usual, and he looked as if he hadn’t gotten any sleep for a long time. I came to a halt in front of him and cleared my throat. “No. I am fine, please, just … leave me alone for a while.” His voice sounded stressed, bothered and tired at the same time. “Leiftan”, I said firmly. His eyes shot open, they looked irritated and red. He looked as if he couldn’t believe that I was there, then he hugged me tight, making me feel the pain in my back once again. We engaged in a short conversation, in which I was informed about the funeral for three fallen Fenghuangs at the mausoleum, before we parted ways again.

I searched for my friends to make sure that they were okay, but it had become dark soon and so I went to the mausoleum. Members of the Guard of El as well as the Fenghuangs stood in a circle around the three fallen ones. Looking at the bodies of those who did not make it was too hard to bear for me. Tears clouded my vision and I felt as if I did not have the right to take part in this ceremony. The people in front of me were dead while I was saved. It seemed so selfish to me, unfair. I turned to Feng Zifu, who stood right beside me, excused myself, turned around and walked away. All of these people could’ve had a future if only somebody else had been chosen by the Oracle. If I had only known what to do. If I had fought harder. Huang Hua’s people had to suffer three losses while I had been allowed to live on. My head was a mess and as I turned the doorknob and entered my room, I could do nothing but immediately fall to the floor and curl up.

My sobs faded out every other sound, so only when somebody touched my shoulder, I knew that someone even entered my room. I straightened up when I saw a person with blue hair through my blurry vision, then he said my name. He was shaking. “What do you want from me?”, I said with an angry undertone. Ezarel came in at the worst moment, I didn’t want to look so vulnerable in front of him. He called out my name again, then I felt his lips against mine. “Are you crazy?”, I backed away. With mixed feelings I walked back to my bed and sat down. I was shocked, and my head started spinning once again and I closed my eyes. I heard his footsteps as he went to the door, then I heard the door close.

To my surprise I also heard footsteps coming towards me, then the mattress gave in as somebody sat down next to me at the edge of the bed. “How can I make it up to you again?”, the elf muttered. I couldn’t believe what I heard. His voice had lost every sense of its usual happiness, leaving behind one of the most broken ones I had ever heard before. “When I ran up to you, when I … when I saw you laying on the floor. When I thought you were dead, I didn’t know what to do anymore. Everything went blurry, it was as if I had lost myself. The last three days had been ones of the worst of my life. Every single second of my days was filled with regret.” I looked at him, but he was only staring at the floor. “I regretted telling you to forget me. I don’t want you to forget me. I want you to remember me, even in your worst days where you’d like to forget everybody and everything.” His voice broke and I could see tears coming out of his eyes.

“When I first saw you … I thought I was better than you. I thought you were incapable, but you proved me wrong. You were there for everybody, helped whenever you could. And even after we had done this horrible thing to you, you still forgave us.” The elf murmured more and more, his speech becoming faster. His hands trembled, then his whole body started to tense up. I was speechless at what Ezarel said to me. I took one of his hands and signalled him to come closer to me. He did as I wanted and soon I found myself in his arms once again.

“I was so stupid. I thought you couldn’t love the real me. I acted all the time, thinking I had to be good enough. But then I saw you running away from me. And as I saw you laying there on the ground … then I noticed it. That you were, in fact, in love with who I am all this time. And that I don’t want to lose you.” There was a pause in which you could feel the static in the air between us. “But do you even still love me?”, the elf asked suddenly. It was obvious that I did, but could I forgive him? Could I trust him that he would not change his mind again, as he had done only a few days before? “Yes, I do, Ezarel.”

Not even a second afterwards, I already felt his lips against mine again. His kiss felt hungry, desperate, as if every cell of his body needed it. And my kiss probably felt the same as I couldn’t relate more to these emotions. Our lips didn’t let go of one another for minutes, our kiss becoming more and more desperate. A shiver went through my whole body as I felt the lust grow within me. I let myself fall onto the bed and pulled Ezarel on top of me, making out even harder until I felt a sharp pain in my back and flinched. “Does it hurt a lot? Let me see.” I nodded and sat up after he climbed down, now kneeling on the bed. I felt his fingertips ran over my skin after revealing my wound, sending more and more shivers down my spine the longer he did it. Soon, his fingertips were replaced by his lips and I could only imagine what having his lips touch every part of my body must feel like.

He started moving his tongue from my lower back to my neck and I couldn’t hold back anymore. I turned around and kissed him again, then I removed his top. His hands wandered to the closure of my bra and opened it, then he let my bra fall next to my top and kissed my erect nipples. His cold lips around my warm nipples pleasured me in a way I had never felt before and I laid down onto my back once again before my knees could give in. He took the opportunity to pull down my pants and lingerie, gently placing kisses onto my thighs and working his way up. I pushed my hips upwards, signalling him to go further and he buried his face right between my thighs. His tongue gently explored my vagina, licking up and down and then making circles around my erect clit. He turned his face and sucked on my thighs, leaving his marks behind, before returning of my soft spot. His hands explored my body, then he intertwined the fingers of his right hand with the ones on my left hand. His left hand went down from my hips to the inside of my thighs.

The elf looked up, making sure I was okay with what he did next. He licked one of his fingers, then placed it in front of my wet entrance. He looked directly into my eyes before continuing and I nodded. I couldn’t talk anymore, his tongue made left me speechless and I only wanted more. His finger was cold as it slowly entered me, but this only turned me on even more. As soon as his finger was inside me, he put his tongue onto my clit again, now moving his finger back and forth. I slowly forgot everything around me, there was only him and me and this went on for a while, until he backed off and I felt another finger at my entrance. Once again, he looked at me closely, making sure it didn’t hurt as he filled me up even more. I pushed my hips against his fingers, shivering in pleasure as I was doing so. His mouth yet again found my clit and he was sucking and licking, moving his hand in a rhythm that drove me mad.

I felt my orgasm come closer, so I told Ezarel to stop. He pulled his fingers out of me and backed off. I then signalled him to lay down just as I did before and sat up. As soon as he was on his back, I pulled down his pants, revealing a huge stain of precum on his underwear and his erect penis. The sight made me feel even hornier than before and I quickly took off his underwear as well, throwing it and his pants next to my clothes. I was clueless about what I should really do with his penis, it was my first time being intimate with someone else after all. I figured I’d start with grabbing it gently with one hand and pushing my hand up and down. Ezarel closed his eyes and hummed gently, which I took as a sign that he enjoyed what I was doing. After a few minutes I figured I’d take him into my mouth and surprise the elf, so I lowered my face. My mouth wrapped itself around his cock and I sucked gently, then bobbed my head up and down in a steady rhythm. My right hand found his left one, doing the same as he had done to me. His right hand grabbed my head gently as he thrusted his hips to the rhythm.

“I- … I’m so close …”, he gasped. He seemed as if he couldn’t decide if he wanted me to continue or if he wanted me to stop. Suddenly he pulled my head back, then pulled me on top of him. “I want you, Ez.” Upon hearing this, he was all over me. One hand squeezed my butt, another played with one of my nipples. His tongue was in my mouth and our tastes mixed up.

“Do you really want to?”, he asked after pulling away for a moment and I felt as his cock twitched against my stomach. I nodded and placed sat up a bit more again, until I felt the tip of him at my entrance. He told me to take my time, so I slowly let myself down, his twitching penis entering me and filling me up. It hurt more than I thought it would, but it felt good at the same time. I couldn’t get enough, my heart was beating faster than ever before. As he entered me completely, I sat up completely. He groaned and put his hands on my hips. “Move as you please, in your own tempo. I don’t want to hurt you.” I moved my hips, and with every move Ezarel inhaled sharply. His dick twitched more and more inside me and I could feel how wet it started to become. As it became easier for me to move, I increased my tempo more and more. I couldn’t care less if everyone in the temple could here my butt slapping against his thighs right now whenever I let myself fall backwards. All there was in this moment was him and I.

He grabbed my breast again, caressing and twisting my nipple slightly, which only increased my lust. I was close, and I was so ready to cum with him. It was as if he could hear my thoughts. “Cum with me, honey, please.” He moaned as he filled me with his cum, and I came as well, the mixture of my wetness and his cum dripping down my thighs.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !! Spoilers for the beginning of Episode 21 !!  
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !! Spoilers for the beginning of Episode 21 !!  
> (I have played approximately 10% of this Episode up until now, so the beginning of the Episode is the only thing I can currently write about.)

I woke up feeling different. The warmth that I had felt the day before was replaced by a fresh breeze coming in from the window. The body I had felt next to mine before had gone. Or had he even been there to begin with? Had it all been a dream, just like the ones I had had before? I looked down onto the floor, seeing my clothes in a messy pile and knew that last night had been real. But where was Ezarel?

The door opened just as I wanted to pick up my clothes and Ezarel entered with two cups in his hands, carefully balancing them. He looked just as different as I was feeling, but not in a negative way. His eyes were shining bright and he looked at me cheerfully. “Good morning!” As he made his way over to me, he tripped slightly at the last step and a few drops the liquid in one of the cups swapped onto his hand. “I brought you some tea for breakfast, but from what my hand experienced just now I recommend waiting for a few minutes until it cooled down.” With a sheepish smile he placed the cups onto the nightstand and wiped his hand on his clothes, signalling me that he didn’t hurt himself. Looking over to the window he exclaimed, “I opened it before I left. It was kind of … hot in here after what happened yesterday.”

I chuckled and blushed. Just a few days ago I wouldn’t have thought about being in this room with my beloved elf like this. Our mission had been to help the HQ and especially the Great Crystal, one of the most important missions I had been on at that time. That there even had been time to come closer to each other, yet alone this close, was fascinating to me. The thoughts of the night before made my stomach fill with butterflies and I couldn’t hold back from nearly jumping into his arms. His heart was racing as he squeezed me tight, his hand playing with my hair. He gave me slight kisses onto my forehead before letting me go again. “Why didn’t you wake me up? We could’ve gone to get some tea together,” I asked. “You, surprisingly, were pretty beautiful while sleeping and I didn’t want to disturb you.” He grinned, just as usual when he jokingly insulted me. “Idiot.”

The tea he brought me tasted like honey which didn’t surprise me. We sat in silence as we both took sips from our cups, staring into space. His timid, nearly shy behaviour surprised me. Normally, he would had already made several jokes about my face, the way I drink or anything else that came to his mind. I didn’t mind not being insulted for once – it didn’t really bother me after knowing him for some time anyways, as he never meant what he said – but his silence made me wonder if something was up.

“What’s wrong, Ez?” I gently nudged his side. “Nothing. It’s just hard to believe you’re my … girlfriend.” His eyes widened as it came to his mind that we hadn’t asked each other out yet. “Unless you don’t want to be labelled as that?” I once again couldn’t help but throw my arms around him, “would you like this to be official? You? You’d be with me?” He stared into my eyes thoughtfully, “I thought I made that clear last night.” He took my cup, put it on the nightstand next to his and pushed me back onto the bed. “Or does someone need a reminder?” he grinned sexily, grabbing one of my breasts and squeezing it. My insides started to burn instantly, I was hungry for him and his body. Although the guards of El were constantly on missions and didn’t have a lot of time for caring about their appearance, Ezarel’s skin was soft and nearly spotless. I had to admit that I was jealous, but maybe he’d mix me some kind of magic skincare product in his Alchemy Lab if I asked nicely.

I pushed my body closer to his, wanting him to touch me. He lowered himself down to me, kissing me intensely. His hand wandered up and down my thigh, slightly brushing my sweet spot and I buckled my hips. Suddenly, he sat up again and grinned at me. “That was enough of a reminder!” After looking at my puzzled face he added, “we’ll leave this place after lunch. But I’d actually like to have some time to pack my stuff and, more importantly, eat some breakfast.” He stopped and grinned sheepishly, “Listening to your stomach growling like that, I suggest you should do the same, before you decide to eat me.” I groaned in frustration but decided to follow his advice. I gulped down the last bit of the now cold tea, letting the taste of honey drip down my throat. Ezarel handed me my clothes, but I didn’t want to go to the dining room with the sweat from the night before still on me. “I’ll take a shower, want to come with me?”

The showers were empty, but we were cautious nonetheless. I entered one of the showers at the back and Ezarel followed me. The bright light didn’t leave much room for mystery, unlike the darkness from the night before and I felt vulnerable and shy, covering my body with my hands while staring at the confident aura that Ezarel projected. He placed his hands on my sides and without any warning pushed me under the stream of water which had still been too cold. I screamed loudly and shrill, but he placed his hand over my mouth to silence me. As revenge, I placed my hands onto his sides and tickled him, but he put on a poker face. My touch became more gentle and my hands once again wandered over his soft skin. He sighed heavily and I noticed his penis stiffening. I placed my hand onto his thigh, gently wandering up his leg until I touched him directly. Ezarel let out a quiet moan and pressed his hips forward against my hand. “That was enough of a reminder,” I whispered devilishly and proceeded to take my shower as if he wasn’t there at all. He groaned.

The dining room was full of people when we arrived. “Hey! Did you sleep well?” Chrome approached me. To be quite honest, I slept well but wasn’t well rested at all, which wasn’t surprising when thinking about how my night was spent. Our conversation ended and I sat down at the table next to the blue-haired elf. Eweleïn sat I front of us and it was only then that I dawned on me: She was my roommate, but where did she spend the night? She had told me in the past that she had had a physical relationship with Ezarel. This ended due to him not reciprocating her feelings, which had still bothered her a few months prior. However, the head nurse had been one of my good friends in the Guard of El and I didn’t want to hurt her, even if she had already known about my feelings for him and accepted them. I decided to ask her directly as to avoid confrontations in the future, “H-hey Eweleïn, I didn’t hear you come into our room last night. Where did you sleep?”

She explained that she saw me leaving the ceremony the day prior and asked Feng Zifu, who told her I wasn’t feeling well. Because of this she decided to let me have my space and added, that there were many other beds available in the temple. “And mine is the most comfortable, right?” Huang Hua entered the conversation and winked at me before sitting down next to Feng Zifu. Eweleïn blushed and added, “we talked for most of the night, then I dozed off.” She whispered, “I won’t do that again, I don’t want anyone to think that something is going on between us.” I reassured her that even if that was the case, it was nobody’s business but theirs. She had already needed this reassurance before, after talking to me about her relationship to Ez and assuming I or others were thinking she was sleeping around. “But it’s not the case and I don’t want to be the centre of gossip.” I once again told her not to worry so much. “Because you don’t count on hiding it?”, she answered and looked back and forth between the elf and me. I didn’t know how to take her answer or if she was annoyed, but I explained that I didn’t plan on hiding my relationship. However, I also didn’t feel the need to show or announce it to everybody. The nurse chuckled, promising she wouldn’t scream the news all over Eldarya.

After an announcement from Huang Hua, who told us we’d all depart after lunch, I took a last glance over to Ezarel before going back to my room to pack the rest of my stuff.

At lunchtime everybody stood in front of the temple, ready to say goodbye to the Fenghuangs. Our trip was exhausting, and my heart was beating heavily in my chest. I felt the Great Crystal crying for help and becoming weaker, I could only hope that we wouldn’t arrive at the Guard of El too late. While we took two days for our trip to the Fenghuang temple, our trip back had taken only half the time. The one’s who were too exhausted to go on stayed to rest, and while I felt weaker every minute, I couldn’t stop. I felt that I had to help the Crystal and the Oracle before it was too late, and I thought I could be the only one to do so. I fell off my mount as my vision became dark for a moment, the pounding of my heart had become faster and faster over the course of our trip. My body had become too weak. Huang Hua put me on her mount, trying her best to look after me and making sure I wouldn’t fall off again.

We arrived in front of the Guard of El, and Nevra, Valkyon, and Ezarel hopped off their mounts. They walked through the port, but just as they were about to enter, the shield around the HQ activated and stopped them. “We need to go and help the Crystal!”, I cried out with the last bit of my energy and hopped off the mount I shared with Huang Hua. Painfully slow I dragged myself in front of the gate, holding one of my hands in front of it, touching the magic shield and hoping the Oracle would see me and let me pass. It took all of the magical energy I still had, but after trying hard and being encouraged by my friends, I managed to pass through the shield. However, as I looked back, I could only see Huang Hua. No sign of any other Guard members.

The HQ had never been this empty before. Had we come too late? My pain grew and became nearly unbearable as we walked forward, entering the palace where the Crystal was kept. In front of the sealed door, Huang Hua spoke to me. “The energy of the flute will not be strong enough to heal the Crystal, I will need your magical force as a catalyst. But first, I … want you to understand the risks.” She showed me the flute, which was a strong magical instrument we took with us from the Fenghuang Temple. It was supposed to heal the Crystal, but after having to use it against our enemies when we were attacked, it weakened and was not yet restored to its full capacity. Huang Hua made it clear that there were risks involved in our mission, that I might not survive the process. While I had hoped to have more time with everybody, I knew that my life had not been as important as the future of HQ and the Guard members. I spoke up with determination, “I know I might not survive this, but healing the Crystal probably is the only hope that remains.” She nodded.

We entered the Crystal Room, finding something even more horrifying that I had imagined. The once blue Crystal was surrounded by violet fog and darkness. The pounding in my heart increased and it became heard to breathe, but I signalled her to start playing. Suddenly, I was rising into the air, feeling every music note that my friend played beside me. I was floating toward the Crystal and experienced something, that a lot of people feared for. Death.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !! Spoilers for the beginning of Episode 21 !!  
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !! Spoilers for the beginning of Episode 21 !!  
> As I haven't played through the whole episode yet, there are only spoilers for the beginning of it. Everything else doesn't match with the original story of Eldarya at all.

## moonlight lovers

As the darkness seemed to consume me, I heard a familiar voice. “Hold on!” I opened my teary eyes and looked directly into Ezarel’s face. He was right, I needed to be stronger. I concentrated on my mission again, fully believing that I could make it. The darkness was replaced by a sudden light around me and I heard myself speaking the language which had been long unknown by me, the original language. Even if I could not understand what I was saying, the light disappeared from my vision and I saw the Crystal. His blue colour had been restored, the violet fog and darkness had disappeared. Suddenly, I came to realize that I was still hovering above the floor, not knowing how to come down again. I noticed the Oracle floating around the room, smiling at me before returning into the Crystal, going to sleep. The pounding and pain in my heart had stopped, but suddenly I started falling to the ground. Two strong arms caught me, and I saw the face of my boyfriend, smiling at me.

Suddenly, a voice behind us spoke up. “Huang Hua? How did everyone appear so suddenly?” Ezarel turned around and I looked at our leader, Miiko, who was suddenly standing in the Crystal Room with us. Huang Hua explained to her that the HQ looked abandoned to us and how we managed to enter. Standing in the doorstep were Leiftan, Nevra, and Valkyon, who spoke up about having found a way to enter the HQ after Huang Hua and me. My heart was still beating heavily in my chest as Miiko informed us about having evacuated the HQ but staying with the Crystal, which we had seemingly healed just in time. It must have been hard for her to stay alone with that darkness for this long, so I shot emphatic looks in her direction during our following conversation. After hearing everyone’s side and feeling well-informed, Miiko sent us to go and get some rest, which I was thankful for as my body felt weaker than ever before.

I opened the door to my room and the familiarity and comfort of my bed invited me for a needed sleep. Still in my dirty clothes, I decided to lay down for just a second. However, this second turned into a few minutes and after a while I dozed off to sleep. It was evening when I woke up again, the setting sun was shining through my open blinds and gave the room an orange undertone. “Did I wake you up?”, somebody said in a hoarse and sleepy voice. It obviously was Ezarel, who looked more tired than ever but stood next to my bed. I sat up, noticing how I went to bed with both my dirty clothes and shoes on and groaned annoyedly in my head. “No, I only noticed you were here after you spoke up,” I yawned, “why are you up?” Ezarel’s expression changed from tired to a mix of frustration and worry. I gestured him to come closer, but he refused. “Come with me, please.” He held out his hand, which I grabbed and followed him outside. We walked through the empty corridors, the empty HQ, then through the gate and only stopped after arriving at the beach. A blanket had been spread on the ground and the elf gestured me to sit down, facing towards the sea and the vanishing sun.

There was not a single cloud on the sky. Not far from us were a few fireflies gently hovering above the ground. Suddenly, Ezarel pulled out a jar of honey from under the blanket, as well as a teaspoon. He opened the honey and put the spoon inside, then brought it carefully to his mouth and ate. Then, he told me to open my mouth and fed me. It was a warm evening, one of the most peaceful ones the HQ had seen in a long time. After sitting and eating together for a while, Ezarel spoke up. “I once again thought I had lost you, when you were floating towards the Crystal, do you know that? Don’t do something like that again, I can’t take this awful feeling of losing you anymore,” he begged. I exhaled loudly before speaking up. “I didn’t want to give my life, believe me, but deciding between my life and the greater good … you know.” He didn’t say anything for a while, then he closed the lid of the glass and put the spoon away. “If anyone else heard this, they would probably remove me from the position as leader of the Absynthe Guard,” he chuckled, “but if I had to decide between you and the Guard of El, I’d probably choose you.” A few seconds passed in which my mind was racing. If he had to decide, he wouldn’t really give up all of our friends just for me, would he? “However,” he continued, “if I had to decide between you and a jar of honey, you’d obviously lose.” He gave me his usual sassy smile, then his expression turned tired again and he sighed.

“I couldn’t sleep at all today. I turned and turned around in bed, I was exhausted, but I couldn’t sleep. What if something happened to you? How could I forgive myself?”, the words were flooding out of his mouth. “I needed to check up on you, that’s why I came into your room.” He yawned, then laid down onto his side with his head in my lap. He had eyebags and his face was paler than usual. “Ezarel, go to sleep,” I softly said to him and placed one hand on his cheek. After turning around his face was buried in my stomach and he hummed in agreement.

The evening turned into night as the sun went down completely. I had laid down as well, just looking at the stars and the rising moon, listening to the light snores of Ezarel which came from time to time as well as the waves. I didn’t dare to move as to not wake him up, so his head remained in my lap, even if that position had become rather uncomfortable.

Ezarel shifted, then yawned loudly and sat up. The full moon was above us, lighting up our faces. He took a look at my face before coming closer with his, giving me a deep kiss. His lips were still sweet from the honey and I pushed my tongue into his mouth, exploring it. Without breaking the kiss, Ezarel managed to lie down on top of me, supporting his weight with his hands, which were placed left and right from my head. He became wilder, hungrier, then he backed off for a second to look around. “We’re alone,” he whispered. I knew how risky it was to have sex on the beach, especially since we were right in the open. No trees or stones to protect us from any curious looks, but I didn’t care. It was late at night and nobody would be awake after our long trip back from the Fenghuang Temple anyways. I nodded, giving him the sign to continue.

He sat up and opened my top, which had buttons on the front. After having been freed by my top, I did the same to him. “Honey, please, free me from these pants,” he sighed quietly and I did as I was told. We both stood up as we undressed each other hungrily and quickly and soon enough our clothes were spread out on the floor, probably full of sand and leaving us with only our underwear on. Ezarel pulled me closer, then he let himself fall onto the blanket, dragging me along and laughing. After recovering from my initial shock, I kissed him again, his tongue now exploring my mouth. The butterflies in my stomach were sending shivers down my whole body and I noticed my nipples hardening again. The further please myself, I rubbed my breasts up and down his chest, but the friction from the bra hindered me. With a needy expression I begged Ezarel to undress me completely, which he complied to.

The leader of the Absynthe Guard turned us around, him now being on top of me again. His hands went behind my back and he pulled my bra off and threw it somewhere beside us. Then, he took my panties and pulled them down my legs. Embarrassingly, I could feel how wet they were, and he could see the glimmering stain as well. He gave me a smile, then threw them away as well. Just as the night of our first time together, he started off by kissing my nipples, then sucking on them. However, this time he sucked even more greedily, making a slight bit of pain run through them. He stopped, then gently bit into one of my already slightly sore nipples and a wave of pleasure ran through my body. I could feel my heartbeat throughout my whole body, but it was the worst on my clit. A slight breeze blew, making me once again feel the wetness I had already produced, but also teasing me.

“Ez,” I moaned quietly, but he understood what I wanted. His hand wandered down, teasing me for a bit before really putting his fingers onto my clit. “Someone’s excited, I see,” he grinned and gave me a kiss while simultaneously working on my soft spots. “Let me try something, alright?” he said, and I nodded. He could do whatever he wanted, as long as it would bring me closer to this sweet relief. He pushed one of his fingers into me, but also rubbed my clit. Then he added another finger. It went better than the first time, which probably was due to how wet I already was. But it didn’t matter how good it felt, I finally wanted to really connect and feel him inside of me. I grabbed his hand and put it down beside me, signalling him to lean forward. “Ezarel, I need you,” I moaned. He pushed his lips on top of mine again, sucking and nibbling on my lower lip. His hands grabbed me by the wrists, holding them next to my head, as he moved his hip. He let go of one of my hands and grabbed his penis, directing it to my entrance.

The wetness made it easy for him to glide in, but he stayed still for a while again and didn’t dare moving. As I gave him my okay he started to gently move back and forth, but soon afterwards he already thrusted in and out of me in a steady rhythm. The warm summer air felt cool on my skin as I was burning from our passionate sex. His thrusts became harder, faster, and needier. Ezarel moaned, groaned, and sighed into my ear, and I did the same for him. My hands explored his torso, twisted his nipples just as he did to mine nights before. Sweat was dripping from our bodies and strands of our hair were glued to our faces. However, while we both were in ecstasy and painfully near our orgasms, Ezarel suddenly stopped. “Honey, I’m sorry, but …,” he looked away in shame and whispered, “I don’t think I can continue. I’m still exhausted from our mission and while I absolutely love your body, I really can’t carry on.” I felt bad instantly. He already told me before that he was exhausted, did I really think that he should instantly have sex again after sleeping for an hour? Ezarel slid out of me and a feeling of deep shame replaced my lust. “I’m sorry,” I whispered hoarsely, my voice not far from breaking and my throat filled with some sort of lump. He collapsed beside me and pulled me close to him. “Not your fault, you’re irresistible,” he whispered and fell asleep.

By the time I woke up it was early in the morning and the sun was about to set, but for my taste it had been too late already. Ezarel and I were still laying naked on the beach, him still sleeping beside me, and there was the possibility of some early birds coming down to the beach at any given moment. I woke Ezarel up, explaining to him that we quickly had to leave, but he wouldn’t really listen. While searching for my underwear and putting it on, he sleepily grabbed his boxershorts as well. Suddenly, he seemed to realize something and hurried to put them on. I bent over to grab my pants, but was quickly picked up by Ezarel, who sprinted down the beach and into the sea, where he let me fall. The water was cold, but I was glad to have the sweat washed off me. The elf swam further away from the beach and dived down, I followed him hesitantly. I resurfaced and Ezarel did the same. “You seem refreshed,” I smiled, and he nodded.

The sun had already set as we dressed ourselves and went back to the HQ for a proper shower. Unlike Ezarel, I hadn’t changed my clothes since arriving back and so decided to visit our washing room while he went to grab us something to eat. Miiko had insisted of making us rest for a few days, therefore we didn’t have to wait to be informed about a new mission we had to take part in. To my surprise someone had already been in the washing room, this someone being Leiftan. “Good morning Leiftan, did you already have something to eat or would you like to accompany me to the cafeteria?”, I asked him cheerfully, hoping that Ezarel wouldn’t mind. Leiftan turned around, his face boiling with anger. “Why? Is your current company not enough for you? Do you finally see what you truly need?” He stepped closer, grabbing my clothes from my hands, and throwing them onto the floor. “Did you know how busy the beach can be sometimes when you expect it the least? Did you know how much it hurt, seeing you there with him?” He stepped closer again, grabbing my hands. Before I could even fight back, I felt a pair of lips crashing onto mine.


	4. Chapter 4

Shocked by Leiftan’s sudden change of behaviour I tried to back away, but it was hopeless. Where was the once sweet and helpful boy I knew? And why was he so jealous because of Ezarel? He slid his tongue into my mouth forcefully yet carefully. He mentioned the beach, was he there? And when? What did he see? Once again I tried to back away, tried to free my arms from his tight grip, but my strength was not even half of his, so he held me tight. As the kiss went on, a familiar feeling had begun to form in my stomach. This kiss, that was forced upon me, … I started to enjoy it. An electric wave went through my body and while I had tried to get away before, my lips now hungrily pressed themselves against Leiftan’s. My brain told me to stop while my body felt as if I’d drop dead once it was over. I clung on his lips, my last source of life. As soon as Leiftan noticed my burning passion, he stopped the grip he had on me, replacing it with a tender touch. His hands wandered over my body, my hips, onto my butt.

Suddenly, he backed off from me and looked past me with an expression as if he had seen death itself. “Ezarel, it’s- I can explain!”, Leiftan cried out, finally getting away from me. I turned around quickly, realizing the mistake I had made. What had come over me? “I don’t want to hear anything from either of you anymore,” the elf said coldly, turned around and left. Why didn’t he even want to listen to me? Leiftan stormed out of the room, leaving me alone and unable to move.

It had been a hard day, even if it began so well. Everything I had the past few days seemed to have vanished because of a situation I seemingly didn’t have any control over. Sometime after Leiftan left and I still hadn’t moved, my friend Keroshane found me in the middle of the room sitting on the floor and crying my eyes out. It hurt having been used like this by Leiftan, whom I thought had been a good friend. I was kind of disgusted by having a part of his blood running through my body, even if it had kept me alive a few days prior. But I was even more hurt by Ezarel, who didn’t want to talk to me at all. Kero brought me to the big cherry blossom tree in the gardens of the HQ, where he told me to spill it all out. As he also took part in our mission to the Fenghuang Temple, he had noticed I now was with Ezarel. Or had been?

“I just don’t understand why Leiftan would suddenly act this way,” I sighed. It confused me. “He had always been rather shy towards me, and gentle. Not forceful and jealous.” After coming to terms with the fact that we didn’t have any clues about Leiftan’s sudden change of behaviour, we decided to talk about Ezarel. “Don’t get me wrong, but maybe you should talk to Eweleïn. If anyone of us had ever had any relationship problems with him, she’s the one,” Kero said and smiled at me apologetically as if it was his fault that he couldn’t help me. I thanked him and I made my way up to the nursery, where I knocked at the door. As the door opened however, familiar blue hair stood in front of me. His cold expression tore my skin apart, his eyes didn’t meet mine once while looking at me. “Eweleïn doesn’t have time.”

I had never before wanted to do less. Everything felt as if the world had stopped turning, every second felt like a minute and every minute felt like an hour. I decided to go back to the old cherry tree, sat down and stared into space. People went by, not noticing me, and I felt as if the whole world knew what had happened. Finally, someone turned and faced into my direction, slowly walking towards me before turning around and leaving my field of view again. I had enough of sitting under this tree, so I stood up and was greeted with an unusual dizziness. I had not eaten yet and my stomach growled, but the lump in my throat only grew and the only thing I wanted to do was vomit. I dragged myself over to another part of the gardens, but it was empty as well. The sun was directly above me now, burning down on me and increasing the heat I felt in my body. My thirst grew as I started sweating, which is why I decided to go to the cafeteria.

I hadn’t even walked into the door and was already confronted with a deafening volume. The cafeteria was full of people, it was lunchtime after all, but I couldn’t ignore my need for some sort of liquid any longer. As I already didn’t eat properly, I at least decided to get myself something sweet to pump up my blood sugar levels for some energy. With a glass of water in one and a spoon in the other hand, I made my way to the shelf full of honey. I was surprised to see all the different variants but knew that this was probably due to Ezarel. It was hard to decide which one I should take, but after thinking about it for a few seconds I just picked the jar with the least amount of honey in it. “It has to be good if there isn’t a lot in it anymore,” I thought.

“Thank you,” the familiar voice of Ezarel said harshly and he took the honey out of my hands before vanishing again. At this point I had enough of it all, just gulped down my water and went out to the corridors again. I headed to my room as I noticed footsteps behind me, coming closer. A hand tapped onto my shoulder and I turned around, seeing Leiftan. “Not now,” I hissed and ran away before he could do anything else to me. I locked the door to my room and laid down in my bed which was still full of dirt from the night before. “Who forgets to take off their dirty clothes and shoes?” I asked myself angrily but couldn’t really care less about it at that moment.

A knock on the door woke me up from a light nap and I quickly stood up and unlocked it. In front of me stood the whole Guard of El with Miiko in the middle of all of them. “We decided it will be better for us if you leave. Now!” she screamed furiously, then grabbed me by the hand and dragged me to the gate that separated the HQ from the rest of the land. After having been thrown out, I ran back again and again, but even the shield, that once had let me in while it left everyone else outside, was against me. I hammered my fists against the shield, screaming. “Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave,” voices chanted, the loudest of them all was Ezarel’s. Suddenly, a warm voice appeared before me, chanting as well. “Stay. Stay. Stay. Stay … with me.” I saw the silhouette of Leiftan, smiling at me with love in his eyes.

I woke up in complete darkness. It was just a dream. However, the knocking on my door was real and I curiously opened the door. In front of me was nobody, and even after looking left and right, I couldn’t see any traces of somebody having been there. Disappointed, I closed the door again and turned around only to see a familiar silhouette looking directly at me. His blonde and black hair looked terrible, as if he had swum in the sea and dried it by standing in a hurricane. There were knots in it and it was overall frizzy and hanging directly into his face. “I wanted to say that I am sorry. What I have done is unforgiveable. Please know that I am feeling worse than you could ever imagine I would.” Leiftan’s green eyes looked directly into mine, showing more remorse than I thought would’ve been possible. All of these mixed feelings I suddenly seemed to have for him made me uncomfortable. But unlike in the laundry room, I was angry. Very angry. And found it absolutely inacceptable that he just entered my room without my permission, especially after overstepping my boundaries just a few hours before. It reflected how little he apparently respected my privacy or feelings, and the only thing I could do was scream, “Leave!”, which he thankfully did.

I didn’t feel safe in my room anymore, so I wandered around the HQ. After remembering that Kero told me I might be able to speak to Eweleïn in the evening. I headed to her room and entered upon hearing her voice telling me to come in. Eweleïn sat on her bed in her sleepwear, brushing her hair. Once she saw who entered, an uncomfortable expression appeared on her face for a second, which was replaced by a forced neutral smile. “Uhm, come in. Do you need anything?” If her facial expression before hadn’t already made it clear that I wasn’t welcome, her forced voice would have. My heart sank instantly, and I already turned around, ready to mutter something about having come into the wrong room, as I heard her standing up and walking towards me. She sighed. “I think we need to talk, don’t we?” she asked, grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room again and onto the bed where I sat down.

The moonlight that had shone upon Ezarel and me just the night before now gave Eweleïn’s room a mysterious aura. She sat down on a chair in front of me after closing and locking the door, giving us some privacy. For a few minutes nobody said anything, until I brought up the courage to address the elephant in the room. “I assume Ezarel didn’t come to the nursery because of medical reasons today, am I wrong about that?” I tried to sound as calm and possibly even cheerful as possible, but at the end I just sighed heavily. Only now I realized what more could’ve happened between them than just the talk about what happened, which I had assumed earlier. My stomach tightened at this thought and the lump in my throat, which had been gone since I had gone to bed, was present again. Who would blame Ezarel for breaking my trust just as I broke his?


	5. Chapter 5

“No, you are not wrong about that,” Eweleïn admitted, “But I do not want to discuss in detail what he had been there for. That’s a talk you should have yourself.” My heart sank even further. Why couldn’t she just tell me? I waited for her to continue, but once again silence took over. After some time, she spoke up again with fury in her eyes, “Look, I don’t want to get angry at you. You’ve done nothing wrong to me personally, but why did you do this?” These words pierced through my heart, but deep inside me I knew that she couldn’t know the truth, couldn’t know about the feelings that had been overcome me. I inhaled and exhaled deeply a few times before I started to talk. My friend listened carefully at my words, but I could see the doubt in her eyes. The cold light the room was in mirrored her expression perfectly and only added to the atmosphere. As I mentioned how my body reacted without my mind wanting it to, her expression changed for a split-second. She told me to stay quiet for a while as she had to think.

The silence was deafening, even more so than the loud chatting in the cafeteria from before. Ewe whispered something to herself before shaking her head. “Please, leave for now. I have to think about all of this,” she said and walked me to the door. My stomach was growling, so I decided try and get something to eat, otherwise I hadn’t eaten anything except for a few spoons full of honey since our arrival in the El region. It was dark in the cafeteria, even Karuto had left the kitchen. I could’ve used a few wise words from our cook, as well as a warm meal, but I quickly shook the thought of delicious soup away. Instead, I went to the shelf full of honey again. This time with a slice of bread and something that looked like butter.

The next day had been just as uneventful as the former one. Lying in bed, sitting underneath the cherry blossom tree and overall, rather being alive than living. Had I felt better I could’ve even enjoyed the warm and sunny day. But the more time had passed, the lonelier I felt. Keroshane came to visit, but he couldn’t bring me any news from Eweleïn or Ezarel. And everyone besides him seemed too busy to notice me, but I didn’t blame them. I felt bad for not helping them repair HQ, but the constant dizziness made it hard for me to work. What surprised me was that while Valkyon, Nevra, and even Leiftan ran around outside, I didn’t once see Ezarel despite having a good look at the busiest place of the whole HQ. I decided to look for him. My heart couldn’t take not seeing him any longer.

The alchemy lab had been the first place I looked into, but while the busy elf usually spent his free time in there, he for once didn’t. He also wasn’t in the cafeteria, but I noticed that the honey he took from me was back in the shelf. Nobody I asked had seen him at all this day. I assumed he was in his room and took all the courage I still had left within me to knock on his door.

The first thing I saw as he opened the door was complete darkness. When I saw his face, I noticed that he had puffy eyes as well as a red nose and lips. Despite this, his voice was as clear as usual, just colder and more distant. “Go away,” he said sternly and started to close the door. Before it was closed completely, I begged. “Please hear me out.” I heard him go away from the door, but as it remained open, I took it as a sign to come in. My eyes had a hard time adjusting to the sudden darkness I was in, so I just closed the door and stood there. “You don’t want to come near the real me, do you?” he called out. His voice didn’t sound cold and distant at all anymore, only broken and full of anger and sadness. His words didn’t make any sense to me, but I came closer to where his voice came from, nearly tripping over something but finding my balance again.

“Thinking you could love me was foolish, but did you have to make this so obvious to me?” “Ezarel, I-“ He didn’t listen, only started rambling again. Words that I couldn’t understand, words that were whispered or swallowed. My eyes adjusted to the darkness little by little and I now could see the elf laying on top of his bed. He was curled up in the foetal position with his hands on his face. It was a heart-breaking sight. My heartbeat became faster, my hands started to tremble more and more. I didn’t know how to stop his seemingly endless rambling, how to take away his pain. I had hoped deep inside me he’d listen to me, understand me. I touched his cheek shyly.

His cheeks were wet and hot. Right in front of me was the most vulnerable I had ever seen Ezarel, and I didn’t know how to deal with the pain of knowing that it was all because of me. I approached him further, stopping in front of his bed but deciding to lay down next to him. As he felt the mattress sink, he curled up even further, his arms around his head as to shield himself from more damage. He stiffened as he felt my arms around him. Instinctively, I started talking. “Ezarel, it was not what you think,” but he didn’t want to hear any of it. He jumped up irrationally, completely unlike himself, and spit words of anger in my face. He grabbed me by the arm and dragged me across the room until he threw me out of his room and locked the door behind me. I hammered against it, tears streaming over my face from both the pain inside, as well as the pain the punches left on my hands. It was silent on the other side of the door.

Two arms appeared around me, picking me up and hugging me tight. The familiar scent of the Lorialet crept into my nose, engulfing me more and more as he carried me away. Tears kept falling onto his clothes, but Leiftan wasn’t bothered by it. I pushed my face against his shoulder as blood was rushing into my cheeks. My mind was wandering, my thoughts about Ezarel had stopped completely. There were only the strong man holding me and myself, even the hallways we went through had become blurry and irrelevant. And had I struggled just a day before, I didn’t want anything beside the man that carried me so gently now. His steady heartbeat, his comfortable walking speed, and his breathing rhythm, as well as the exhaustion from past days brought me to sleep.

I woke up in a mesmerizing room. The blue ceiling had been decorated or enchanted with stars and the bed I was on was even more comfortable than my own. I must have slept well, as it had become night already. Energy was running through my body, all the bad thoughts that had run through my brain had stopped. Who cares about Ezarel? Everything I had was, in fact, next to me. The blond-haired man was lying next to me, sound asleep. The moonlight shone onto his face, giving his features a mysterious touch. Unlike Eweleïn, he didn’t look cold in the blue light at all.

The green eyes opened up, staring at me intensely, and Leiftan looked at me with the most relaxed expression I had ever witnessed on him. My body had not ever felt better, and I had the urge to touch him, to consume him, to be his and make him mine. The intensity of my feelings had only grown stronger the past minutes I had been awake, but as I had seen that Leiftan undressed himself, I couldn’t hold back. Every part of my body was hit by an incredible feeling and I wished nothing more than to be intimate with this man. I didn’t care where these feelings came from, I had to satisfy them. Every inch of my body wanted to be pleasured, touched and kissed. I wanted to have soft and sensual sex with him, as well as the roughest sex I could ever have. My body was in heat, I could feel the redness on my cheeks and ears, the lust in my eyes. I sat up, the slight friction I felt had been enough to send a wave of lust through my body, signalling my nipples to harden. This had been the time I noticed that I was already naked.

Leiftan’s expression started to change as he noticed my desires. My brain became foggy and cloudy, I couldn’t think straight anymore. He grabbed me by the hair and pulled my face down to his. His cold tongue entered my hot mouth, once again exploring it thoroughly. He tasted like heaven. I pushed his tongue back with my own, now exploring his mouth while simultaneously inching closer to him. My bottom was lying on him, my torso held up by the elbows I placed onto the bed. My hands were in his hair, on his cheeks, at his neck, everywhere my position allowed them to be. His hands were moving over my body gently at first, then demanding. One found its way to my ass, squeezing it, while the other explored my sides and kept trying to get a good hold on my breast.

He found a good position and pinched my nipple, making me moan. We were like animals, only wanting pleasure, only wanting to fulfil our most simplistic desire. I felt his hard cock on my lower half of my torso, twitching, leaving the precum it had shot out on me. As the hand, which he had placed on my butt before, wandered further and stroked my clit, it was over. Point of no return. I needed him, if he stopped right there, I would have gone crazy. I took the initiative, sat up and straight onto his enormous cock, which filled me up straight away. The pain I felt inside of me was bothersome, but I chose to ignore it in favour of my pleasure. This was not just me being normally horny, this was something entirely different. My mind wouldn’t snap out of it, there were no other thoughts than the ones I had about him and me. The Lorialet seemed to feel the same, he pushed into me right as I sat down. His hands guiding my hips, smashing me against him after every time he had pushed me away. I couldn’t contain myself, neither could he. We panted, moaned with pleasure for the few minutes our bodies were connected. Our desire was fulfilled, a few seconds after I came, I felt his hot cum drop down my thighs and onto the sheets. I let myself fall next to him, completely exhausted.

As I woke up again, Leiftan was nowhere to be seen. My mind went through the events of the night before, horrified at what I had done. What had gone over me? Why couldn’t I resist the thought of pressing my body against his, and why was it there in the first place? Even shortly after the blood transfer it had not been there at all, it could not be the reason. I needed to talk to Eweleïn, but before that I needed a shower. I couldn’t talk to Ezarel before all of this had been cleared up.

I stormed into the infirmary, luckily Eweleïn had been alone. She rushed to lock the door as I told her that it regarded Ezarel. With red cheeks and shame in my eyes, I confessed to her. I already had expected her to demonize me, but she seemed to even … understand me. After the confession, tears were streaming down my face. I felt like a little child who had made a mistake and confessed to his mother, ready to be punished. The nurse put a hand onto my shoulder, caressing me. After a few minutes, she broke the silence.

“I feared this would happen,” she paused. “I was so sure that what I thought was wrong. And what I am going to tell you will not be to your delight, I’m sorry.” I gulped but nodded at her to continue. “Sometimes, people from our world just have some sort of connection to each other. Some sort of bond. It’s nothing we’re able to have any control about.” How could I explain this to Ezarel, whom my heart really belonged to? And even if he believed me, how could he manage my confession that my body longs for somebody else? I looked at my dear friend, “Is there a way to break this?” But she only shook her head and shrugged, her face full of sympathy and sadness. I left the room, frustrated at the lack of information or solutions I had been given. I couldn’t talk to Ezarel until I had gotten rid of these feelings, otherwise I would hurt him. And at the same time, I had to avoid Leiftan, whose weird behaviour I apparently couldn’t resist.

I rushed to my room, feeling as if I had to escape the whole world. As I opened the door, I couldn’t believe who stood in front of me.


	6. Chapter 6

The air turned cold upon entering my room, his presence scared me. How should I deal with my problems if there was no solution? The blue-haired elf turned around, his face filled with sadness and I could feel my heart breaking. “Where have you been?” he asked gently, curiously. Should I lie? “I can’t tell you,” I avoided his gaze. He made a step forward, “I have been waiting for you … the whole night. I’m sorry that I kicked you out, just as you started to explain. Explain to me now. I’m ready.” His voice sounded stable, filled with determination to know the answers that I couldn’t give him yet. I looked down onto the floor, silence taking over us as nobody dared speaking a word. “He was my partner, I should be able to confide in him,” I thought to myself.

I opened my mouth but not a single word dared to escape my lips. Ezarel took another step into my direction, he had gained back his rationality. “I had been in Leiftan’s room,” I stared at the floor again, ready to be screamed at. But no scream had come out of the elf’s mouth. Silence once again took over, until it was broken by the sounds of sobbing and sniffing. I was so angry at myself, so angry that exactly the one thing happened Ezarel was probably thinking about. The door shut behind me as I ran outside, as far away from the Guard of El as possible. Until I found myself at the beach where I suddenly collapsed. I felt as if I was dying.

I woke up in a bed that didn’t belong to me, once again. The sterile smell combined with the voice of Eweleïn made it clear, that I was in the infirmary. Another smell came to me, a smell that I had been more intimate to me than I wanted it to. I opened my eyes and turned to the left, where Leiftan laid on the bed, his skin unusually pale and his torso bandaged.

As soon as she noticed I was awake, Eweleïn rushed to my bed. She took her tests as usual, informing me about my excellent vitals. “I don’t know what could have caused all of this,” she mumbled, “Chrome had found you on the beach, unconscious.” She sighed heavily and frustrated before walking over to Leiftan’s bed, checking if he didn’t wake up yet. As she was sure he wouldn’t be able to listen, she walked over to me again. “He collapsed at the same time, Nevra said. They had been out on a mission as Leiftan was stabbed with a blade.” “Could there be a connection?” I asked. I wasn’t sure if it was possible, but after these change of feelings within me, it didn’t seem too out of this world. The nurse thought for a while before nodding, staring into space. “It wouldn’t be a shock to me if that were the case. After all, … you two seem to have some sort of special bond.” As Leiftan groaned, she rushed to him.

I had left the infirmary, which had become a far too frequently visited place for me, as I ran into Karenn. She dragged me into the dining hall, ready to tell me about the latest gossip. I was delighted to see that Karuto had prepared a warm meal for everybody and spent my time with my friends, who had not yet noticed anything strange going on with me, Leiftan, or Ezarel.

Lunchtime was up and my friends had to go out for their missions again, while I was alone once again. My thoughts were carried away to both Leiftan and Ezarel, and it only occurred to me at this moment, that the feelings I had for Leiftan had not been there while I was at the infirmary. Quite the opposite, I did not have the want to be in his presence at all. My feet carried me to the infirmary again, where I found myself standing next to Leiftan’s bed. And still, I could not feel anything except for disgust as I thought about his actions. But maybe he had been just as defenceless as I had been? His eyes opened and for the first time in the past days, I didn’t feel like staring into them for longer than necessary. He whispered, “I’m sorry”, before passing out again.

Days went by without seeing Ezarel, who had apparently gone on a mission, and Leiftan, who still had to be in the infirmary. His wounds were deep and Eweleïn insisted on letting him rest fully before talking to me. She told me she’d inform him to visit me when he was free to go. The absence of the two made it easy for me to avoid any questions my friends might have had once they saw how we’d act around each other. I felt as if they wouldn’t understand me, but I didn’t even understand myself. On the fifth day after I passed out, Ezarel had come back from his mission. When we saw each other in the hallways, we looked the other way. Nobody knew how to approach the subject. On the eighth day, Leiftan had finally been allowed to leave the infirmary.

He knocked on my door, blushing as I opened it for him. It was obvious that he knew what I wanted to talk about as I gestured him to sit down harshly. Deep regret was in his eyes, just as it was in mine. The room was silent, only the tapping of my foot was noticeable. We opened our mouths at the same time and closed them again. I broke the silence, “We need to talk.” And so, he started. “I’ve been having these feelings for a while now, these feelings of not being able to withhold myself from you.” His face was red, a shy smile upon his lips. “But I’m afraid they have been there for far longer than yours.” He looked to the left, then to the ground. “I assume your feelings have vanished, or else you’d probably still cling onto my lips,” he chuckled as if he had lost his mind, before composing himself again. He stared into my eyes, losing himself in them for a bit before continuing. “There’s an ancient saying from where I am from.” He sighed audibly, “That when you find your soulmate, the person you love most in this world, and you save this person’s life … they will be bound to you and a spark will be fired inside their hearts. I didn’t think it would work.” He let his head hang in shame, unable to look at me. “What I am saying is, that I shamelessly used this by forcing a kiss upon your lips, therefore starting this feeling of addiction to me,” his voice trembled, “forgive me. I beg you. I can’t live without you.” His eyes started tearing, his hands were trembling.

My knees gave in and I landed on the floor. What decision should I make? I was so angry upon hearing this, but his pained expression made me want to forgive him. Suddenly, a question popped up in my brain, “What do you mean we are bound together?” He explained to me that our lives now were related to each other’s, that if one dies, the other one would too. I gasped in shock and horror. I would have died on the beach before, if Leiftan had not been brought back to the infirmary after having been stabbed. However, as much as we were bound to each other from then on, the weight of this confession made my blood boil and my heart ache. I was bound to this man that I did not love, but that apparently was my soulmate. Leiftan confessed his love repeatedly, begging me to forgive him, but I didn’t know if I could. If it had only been this kiss, and if he hadn’t … hadn’t touched me or had been all over me in bed. I was torn. “Why do you think my feelings have changed again?” I asked him after a while, not knowing what to do with myself. I knew that I should speak to Ezarel, to tell him all the things I’ve found out. “My guess is that your emotions for Ezarel, or nearly dying, or both actually, might be the cause. I’m unsure, I’m sorry.”

The day had turned into night, when I finally made up the courage and stood in front of the room from the man my heart truly belonged to, heart pounding in my chest heavily. I had raised my hand to knock several times, lowering it again after I doubted my ability to speak. HQ was silent, I had met not a single person on my way down the corridor. “What are you doing?”, a voice, Ezarel’s voice, said from behind me. I had not even thought about the fact that he might not be in his room after all. I turned around, my face red, once again feeling like a kid that had done something wrong. “We need to talk, please,” I begged him, and he let me in. Unlike the last time, his face showed no emotion.


	7. Chapter 7

The only light source in the room had come from the moon as Ezarel was lying down on his bed, not looking at me at all. I stood in the middle of the room and was unsure about how I should start our conversation. Thankfully, the elf himself started talking. “I must say, I thought you were different. When I had met you, I was full of hatred towards you. Then, as we became closer, I thought I was wrong.” While his words were somewhat comforting, the bitterness in his voice and the way he said them, sent a shiver down my spine. He sat up, staring at me. “I thought you’d be different. I thought you actually liked me, but now I know that …”, his voice broke slightly, and I could hear the lump forming in it. “Now I know I wasn’t wrong about you at all in the start. You’re disgusting and I wish I hadn’t had the misfortune of meeting you.” My mind wandered off to all the different moments we had with one another. The Fenghuang temple, the beach, the warmth we shared in bed, it all gave me strength to finally speak. “I didn’t think I could say what I am about to say now, but it is not what it looks like,” my voice trembled and the lump in my throat grew with every word I had spoken.

But I knew he was right, that he should wish that he had never met me. I felt disgusting, just like he said. Used, but also as if it were my fault. I couldn’t trust Leiftan again, even if it ached to lose a once good friend. At least not for a while. “Before I tell you what is going on, I want to confess,” I started but immediately was interrupted. “You kissed and slept with him I know.” My eyes widened. Had Eweleïn told him anything? “I … heard it when I stood in front of the infirmary. I wanted to see you when you had collapsed. I stood there, not knowing if I should go in, then I heard the lock on the door and your voice. I listened as you talked to Ewe.” I wasn’t sure if his confession made me feel better or worse, was I glad that I didn’t have to confess? “I also saw him enter your room today, don’t think I don’t know what’s going on around here,” he spoke bitterly. The disgust and disappointment were hidden behind a stone-cold face, but I could hear it clearly when he spoke.

I decided to tell him the next thing without thinking about it too long. “I am bound to Leiftan.” This was the first time I looked directly into my eyes. I rambled on, not knowing when to stop. About the old saying, about the soulmate-thing, about everything. It felt good to tell him, but after my vision became blurry because of heavy tears, I couldn’t make out his reaction. Panic came over me and I started trembling. My legs gave in, and once again I found myself in the arms of a strong man, being carried over to his bed. I could tell that the otherwise collected and rational Ezarel didn’t know what to do or feel anymore. It was clearly visible on his face, that he didn’t know if I was speaking the truth and I couldn’t blame him. He laid me down, then sat on the edge of the bed. Silence came over us, it felt like hours were passing until he spoke up.

“I think I believe you.” His words were making my heartbeat with excitement. “However, …,” he paused before, “this could mean something really, really bad.” I sat up, listening intensely, and signalling him to continue. “I have read about this in a book, but only once. And it’s not a saying.” His voice sounded mysterious. “Leiftan might not be who we think he is.” He sounded even more serious than before, then he rushed out of the room, leaving me alone without a clue on what he thought.

The next day, Miiko herself came into my room, telling me to follow her. She sounded as serious and sad as Ezarel had done the day before. We ran down the stairs into the basement and stopped before the prison. The leader of the Guard of El turned around, looking at me with the most empathic look she had ever given me. “You will not like what you see, are you ready?” I nodded and we entered the prison. Dark walls covered in moss, a dark floor I once had to crawl across as I had been a prisoner in here, and the green water gave the prison a dreadful atmosphere. The cages that where hanging above the water weren’t all empty. Inside one of the cages stood Leiftan, chained up and helpless. As soon as he saw me, he spoke up, “I’m glad to see you. I’m so sorry.” He let his head hang down, not daring to meet my gaze. “Miiko, what is going on?”, I panicked, and she sighed deeply. “Leiftan had been the daemon that corrupted the Crystal. Thanks to what Ezarel told us about you, we could capture him.” I looked over to the guard leaders that were standing in a corner, among them Ezarel.

“As I said yesterday, what he told you is not a simple saying. It’s a prophecy which had been given to daemons and aengels, that the last two of them are foreseen to be soulmates. One of them surely is in love with the other, however, if the other one is not, their bond will be destroyed after a certain amount of time.” Ezarel stared at me, as if I should have understood what he was saying immediately. I looked over to Nevra, who looked just as sad and bitter as the other ones. “What he’s saying is, that Leiftan manipulated you into this bond. He forced you to kiss him while he had some sort of potion in his mouth, making him desirable to you. Disgusting trash,” Nevra shouted the last bit angrily. Valkyon spoke up as well, “The time must have been running out soon, he was desperate.” Apologetically, Leiftan looked among his former friends. He then gazed into my eyes, tears forming in his. “I am sorry. Time ran out, I didn’t know what to do anymore. We’re the last daemon and the last aengel. I can’t live without you, I love you too much to let go.”

At these words, Ezarel jumped forwards, running up to Leiftan’s cage. I held my arm out to protect Leiftan, even if what he did was highly questionable to me. Death or a fight was not the answer and Ezarel looked as if he’d be ready for both. He screamed, “You will never be soulmates, whatever this prophecy might say!” Nevra joined him, “You foul daemon, you traitor! We thought you were our friend!” Valkyon remained silent, looking onto the ground. I stepped back as Miiko went up to me. Thoughts were racing through my mind. I couldn’t be the last aengel, it was impossible. “We are sorry to inform you about your race like this. We had thought and spoke about this the whole night, thinking it could not be real. But indeed, you must be the last aengel and last hope for Eldarya.” She took a deep breath. “And as it is you who is the most important for our future, I’d like to ask you what we should do with Leiftan.” As the guard leaders heard this question, they turned around and fell silent. Every pair of eyes was set into my direction.

I stared back to Ezarel, a face I loved and while I treasured his opinion, I was sure he’d want to kill him. Nevra stared at me the same way, ready to let their former friend die. Valkyon’s face was indecipherable, and Miiko’s face remained neutral. The last face I took a lot at was Leiftan’s. “It is your decision and I will follow, whatever you want,” he said submissively. Two against letting him live, two neutral and Leiftan, whose life was on the line, followed whatever I would say.


	8. Chapter 8

It had not been an easy decision, however, I did not want anyone to die. I chose to let Leiftan live, to show him that the Guard of El would not be the cause for more death and destruction. While Ezarel and Nevra showed their disapproval at first, they soon joined the thought processes of Miiko and Valkyon, who trusted me. It had not been easy for Leiftan to prove his new loyalty to the Guard of El, especially after Miiko announced to the whole Guard that he had been the traitor all along.

A month went by, and with the daemon finally on our side, we captured Ashkore, who had been his ally, easily. The Crystal and the Oracle were safe and the people of Eldarya could finally live in peace. As for the prophecy: Leiftan was happy enough to be my friend, even if he was still in love with me. We were soulmates and incredibly well coordinated, as we saw when I discovered my aengel powers and fought alongside him. Ezarel had not been too happy, but after seeing that I really did not want to be more than friends with Leiftan, and after several discussions, we had found a solution.

“Do you mind if I put some of my stuff in your room?” the elf asked me one day. I was correct when I thought that it was his way to ask if he could move in, I accepted happily. The prophecy had not been mentioned afterwards, neither were the kiss and sex I had with the thought-to-be Lorialet. Ezarel was mine again, as much as I was his.

It had been another hard day at HQ, even if the Crystal had been saved. The damage that had been dealt to the buildings, as well as the emotional problems some people still had, left the Guard members with a lot of work. As the clock hit midnight, I finally could turn the doorknob leading to my room. Total darkness hit my eyes and I couldn’t see anything. Suddenly, crystals that had not been there before, lit up my room, reminding me of little lightbulbs we had on earth. I closed the door and saw that Ezarel had stood behind it so I couldn’t see him. He nodded into the direction of the floor, where pedals of roses and other flowers were laying in the shape of a heart. Their scent was mesmerizing, just as the one I smelled when I hugged Ezarel. His hair had been freshly washed with my favourite scent, jasmine. When I took a step back from him, I saw that he wasn’t wearing his usual clothes, but rather something more casual and elegant.

“This is only the beginning,” Ezarel spoke softly as he took my hand and led my outside. I wish I could have dressed myself in something different, which I told him. The clothes I had been wearing while running around HQ and helping people, which were sweaty, hadn’t exactly been what I wanted him to see me in while he was all dressed up. “You soon won’t need clothes at all anymore,” he whispered in response, making me blush.

We arrived at the beach at a more discreet corner, where yet another heart of flowers was, surrounding the same blanket we had already taken with us once. The thought of this night, the feeling of having sex in the water, sent butterflies through my stomach. “It looks wonderful,” I told him several times over the course of our evening. He had sent Karuto a plead to make several sandwiches and send us a jar of honey. While it was simple, it was one of the best meals I ever had in my life, thanks to enjoying it with the person I loved the most. I kissed him multiple times, the taste of honey on both our lips. “Honey,” he called me a few times, naming me after his favourite taste. We enjoyed the moon above our faces just as we did a month prior. “Now let’s come to the part I’ve been wanting to do for a while now, open up your top, lay down on your stomach,” he told me, and I did.

His hands were full of oil, which he put all over my back, giving me a massage. His hands wandered from my neck to my sides, down to my hips, but still careful as to not get any oil onto my pants. “We could take them off too, you know,” he said, a smirk on his lips. I didn’t hesitate to do so and pulled my underwear down with them, earning an impressed smile from my boyfriend. His hands started wandering down more often, resting on my butt and squeezing it, before running over my legs, giving them the same treatment. However, I only found it fair that he received a massage as well, which he agreed to. Soon we swapped places, my hands now all over him. Seeing his body so freely made me feel all kinds of butterflies and I decided to tease him. “Turn around, love,” I whispered, and he complied, now laying on his back with his private parts exposed completely.

I took another bit of oil, which I then used directly on his penis. It hardened right away at the soft touch. “It feels really, really nice, please don’t stop,” Ezarel whisper-moaned. I could see how much it turned the elf on. Feeling the texture of the oil as it came in contact with his skin already felt good on my hands, I couldn’t imagine how good it must have felt on his penis. It twitched uncontrollably as Ezarel moaned softly, his orgasm coming nearer. I stopped.

“Hey!” the elf pouted, frustration audible in his voice. He groaned and pulled me down onto his level, my chest on his, my vagina directly on this penis. He gently placed my in a way we had never done anything before while my lips were on his, nibbling. His cock was between my legs, able to rub against both my thighs and my vagina, which he soon did. The oil made it easy to do so, leaving both of us with an intense feeling. I felt him getting close again. “Ezarel, please, stop,” I whispered, denying him his second orgasm of the night. I wanted this night to be special, the intimacy should have lasted the whole night. Was it because of I felt bad for not yet having had as good sex with Ezarel as I had with Leiftan this one time? The thoughts didn’t seem to get out of my head. I wanted to please Ezarel the same way, wanted to feel this explosion of emotions with him together. It didn’t have anything to do with my emotions, I simply wanted him to be my everything and to give everything to him. Ezarel, visibly upset, placed my on his stomach. His cock once again twitching, slowly becoming blue. I had heard of that before, but I didn’t think that it would occur this quickly.

It was fun to be in control about his pleasure for once, as it usually had been the other way around. After a while, I started touching him again at the most sensitive spots, earning moans from my partner under me. The vibration in his whole chest made me tingle, the increased frequency of his breathing turned me on even more. I stood up from his stomach, seeing a huge wet spot on it. I wondered if it had only been from the oil or if my own fluids were a part of it as well. Seeing that I stood up, Ezarel did the same. His blue hair was shining in the moonlight, I couldn’t contain my happiness upon seeing his beauty. I was glad that Ezarel picked a more private spot on the beach, I didn’t want to share this sight with anyone else and he looked as if he thought the same. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered as he came closer to me, once again pulling me into his arms.

He picked me up and ran towards the water, just as he had done the last time. Maybe he looked like an adult, but inside he sometimes could be like a little child. But I loved him that way. The cold water yet again sent a shiver through my body and I clung onto Ezarel, not wanting to lose his warmth. Thankfully, he didn’t dive underwater this time, but only kept me close and safe in his arms. He bit his lip and looked down, a non-verbal question I understood immediately. I nodded and felt him at my entrance.

Even if the oil had been washed away, it was easy for him to push himself into me, once again filling me completely. However, as much as he wanted his release before, he kept being gentle and sensual, moving incredibly and teasingly slow. His fingernails dug into my skin just as mine did with his and as he hit the right spot, I had to bite into his neck as to not let out a load scream full of pleasure. He felt me clench onto him, pleading him with my body to go faster and deeper, rougher. “If I’m going to do that, it’ll be over in two seconds, believe me,” he whispered and kept his pace, which frustrated me greatly. But I could sense that he couldn’t keep up this slow rhythm.

He groaned in frustration before taking me faster, deeper, and rougher. We were animals, hungry for each other. The cold water combined with the heat inside of me gave me chills, the nails he used to caress me with sent even more shivers down my spine. Goosebumps appeared on my arms and legs, I could feel it. I was so close, so incredibly close. I was ready to scream his name into the void, to give into my animalistic instincts. I wanted him to take me again and again, filling me up. “E-Ez-“ I groaned in frustration as he pulled out of me, leaving me on edge. As I looked into his face, he smirked at me joyfully before sticking out his tongue.

My legs were weak as we went back on the beach, still shaking from what could have been the orgasm of my life, which was still shaking within me. I now knew what he felt like before, and yet again he took control, but it was fine with me. “We should take a shower,” he stated as he put on his clothes and threw mine at me. Hesitantly, I put them on. I didn’t quite trust this change of atmosphere, did he see anyone?

We arrived at the showers soon after, where Ezarel put out the lights. He ripped my clothes off of me, while doing the same, but more carefully, to his own. We were naked again and I could still see his cock twitching, accompanied by a frustrated smile the elf gave to me. He pushed me into one of the showers but didn’t turn them on, instead he grabbed me by the waist and turned me to face the wall, him behind me. I felt him against my entrance again, not asking this time, as he knew the answer. He slid in easily, once again taking my breath. His hands wandered to my butt, slapping it. He grabbed my hair, pulled me closer to him as the sound of my butt slapping against his hip echoed through the room. If somebody was to come in, they’d knew what was going on instantly.

Suddenly, the blue-haired elf turned on the showers. One of his hands left my butt, then came back with the feeling of soap that he spread onto my hair and skin, washing me. Afterwards he washed himself, at least I thought he did, as his hands left my butt for a while. As he was done, he rinsed the soap off of us and slid out of me, leaving me frustrated once again. “We shouldn’t finish here, come,” he took my hand and handed me my clothes yet again, this time we went to our room.

“Lay down on the bed, naked,” he said before locking the door and turning to me again. I did as I was told and soon my skin met his again, his warmth all over me and his scent making me lose my mind. He delicately nibbled on my nipples, which had been hard for however long we already were together this evening. He then kissed his way from them down to my clit, sucking on it gently, licking it in circles afterwards. Then he came back to my neck, biting down softly. I could see that he had an idea, as his mouth once again rested on one of my nipples, his tongue circling it. He sucked. Hard. It hurt a bit while also making me shiver yet again, something he never failed to do. “I’m sorry, Honey, but …,” he sighed, “I can’t take it any longer, my … penis starts to hurt a lot from the constant denial.” I smiled apologetically and relieved that we had finally decided to cum together, as the denial had also taken its toll on my body.

He slid into me again softly, his movements becoming more animalistic yet again, losing their sensuality more and more. We groaned and moaned together, whispering each other’s names. He came seconds before me, moaning my name. Him pulling out had been the last sensation my body needed to erupt, his name leaving my lips in excitement before his tongue silenced me completely.


End file.
